PUT ME IN THE GAME

Brady Clark – CF

Took the El to the Cell, it was an amazing night for baseball, what could be better! Waiting for the gates to open there were beautiful girls in feathers dancing. Lemme splain, it was Latin Music night, these beautifully feathered girls were hired to dance to salsa music as part of the festivities, life is good!

Met up with CLuke & his family in the CF stands, after munching down a Garden burger, fries, some corn, and washing it down with a Dew. It’s been awhile since I’ve been among the crowd at the ballpark on the Southside. It was also insurance night at the Cell, CLuke works for an insurance company, but not as a salesman, thank God! Lemme tell you from experience, having an insurance salesman as a friend just can’t happen, they have no friends, only potential clients. There was this guy sitting behind us who was eating peanuts, he chose to eat the shell (I’m a shell eater as well), his girlfriend was compelled to tell him how this wasn’t the proper way to eat peanuts, and the shells are dirty. Why do women feel compelled to control men down to how to eat their peanuts? And why do men allow women to control them, ironic that nuts would be involved, it’d be even more ironic if balls were involved, but no balls makes a statement as well. Maybe that’s why I’m not hooked up, things that make you go, HMMM.

Jon Garland was pitching a pretty good game, 3-2 lead into the 7th, brought on Jeff Nelson, and the game was tied after he faced one batter. Jim Thome was sitting this one out with a strained hammy, so now don’t only we not have a centerfielder or middle relief, we also don’t have the BIG bat we got for Aaron Rowand (still a good deal in my book). The bottom of the White Sox order was Ross Gload (.148), Juan Uribe (.208), & Brian Anderson (.164), not exactly murderers row. Why don’t they just start Anderson off with two strikes to speed the game along? With two outs, man on 1st, the game tied, and Brian at the plate, the skipper had to do something. Ozzie sent up Rob Mackowiak to pinch hit, a long flyball to center was just a little short of giving the Good Guys the lead. It didn’t take the Rangers long to realize the Sox had no centerfielder, as Rob’s effort to impersonate one just wasn’t fooling anyone. Mackowiak caught Jason Botts’ fly, Mc Carthy walked Kinsler, BIG BAD Bobby Jenks was summoned, but Gary Matthews Jr knew what to do. He hit a deep drive to, where else, CENTERFIELD! Of course it was a put them ahead for good double, 4-3 Texas. It was like deja vu all over again, as the night before any other centerfielder in baseball would have caught a ball in center that went for a triple.

There just is no way of hiding it any longer Mackowiak CAN’T play centerfield and Anderson CAN’T hit! Kenny Williams needs to make like Monty Hall & Let’s Make a Deal! Maybe we could get Brady Clark from the Milwaukee Brewers and they could move their centerfielder Rickie Weeks (18th error already) away from secondbase? Or possibly we could trade with the totally confused Tampa Bay Devil Rays? Could Colorado’s Cory Sullivan be had? Possibly Laynce Nix? Where is Timo Perez? Maybe I’m getting a little desperate. Maybe I didn’t realize just how good Aaron Rowand was out there. Anyway something needs to be done, ANYTHING!

The White Sox also need to address their need for middle relief, but that’s a story for another day. Can’t solve all the world’s problems in one day, then what would I do tomorrow? Seriously it’s a beautiful day for a ballgame, think I’ll take another trip to the Cell. Tell you all about it when I get back, I’m bringing my glove just in case Ozzie wants to put me in the game, I CAN PLAY CENTERFIELD!

LET’S GO WHITE SOX!!!